Who am I?
Where do I fit in?
What difference do I make?

and answer them in light of this chart below.

Establishing a formal mentorship program is also a responsible way of responding to research that illustrates the importance of adult engagement in the lives of young people. Research has shown that youth need at least five (5) other significant adults in their life, other than their parents. This role could be played by any number of people (youth leader, mentor, prayer partner, uncle or aunt, senior member of the church, older siblings, etc.). It is our goal to offer youth the opportunity to engage with an older adult in a safe place that allows them the freedom to express questions regarding life and faith. Data demonstrates that youth who are connected with an adult member of their congregations tend to stay in church as they move through high school and beyond. At Calvin CRC, we want to offer our mentorship program as an opportunity to establish these kinds of meaningful relationships.

Here’s what one mentor has said of his experience: 
My experience mentoring was great! It’s really valuable to connect with a young person and listen to their stories and struggles. I found that there is a lot of similarity in what they experience and what we as adults are also experiencing today. It’s an opportunity to learn and grow together, while also encouraging faith formation in someone at a critical time of their life.

So, what is a mentor?

• Someone who is willing to offer guidance or instruction that is intended to facilitate the personal and spiritual growth and development of the mentee.
• An adult who walks alongside a young person as they enter into adulthood
• Someone who passes along knowledge and life experience
• Someone who is, or eventually becomes, a friend
• Someone who knows they don’t have all the answers
• Someone who takes the time that love requires to get to know the mentee well.
• Someone who takes the time to listen and share their past.
• Someone who is committed to seeing the program through to the end. (In Calvin’s case that means being a mentor for a young person from grade 9 – 12.  A four-year commitment, once a month, or more if desired.)
• Someone who tries to foster the mutual goal of figuring out who is God calling both the mentor, and the mentee to be.
• Someone who understands that there is an emotional bond between the mentor and mentee, a hallmark of which is a sense of trust that develops over time.

And, what does a mentor do?

A mentor does many things. Some key things are:

• Be consistent – be on time and be there when you say you will be there.
• Be yourself.  Don’t try to be perfect. Be honest, be natural, and be real.
• Listen and provide feedback. The mentor has a broader base of experiences, ideas, and insights to draw from which might be helpful to the one being mentored.
• Be patient – It takes time to build the relationship.  Give it time.  There will be good meeting times, and not-so-good meeting times, but each meeting provides an opportunity for growth.
• Encourage the spiritual disciplines of regular Bible study and personal prayer for your mentee, and share ideas for doing that.
• Be ready to answer spiritual, moral, or ethical questions using Scripture, or be committed to searching out the answers together.
• Honestly share your life experiences. Tell appropriate stories of mistakes you’ve made or others have made, and reveal how God used those mistakes to shape you.

What is the Biblical Model for Mentoring?

2 Timothy 1:1-3 (Loving and Praying)
1 Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, in keeping with the promise of life that is in Christ Jesus, 2 To Timothy, my dear son: Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord. 3 I thank God, whom I serve, as my ancestors did, with a clear conscience, as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers.

This passage reminds us of the love that we need to have for those we are mentoring. This passage also reminds us that prayer is needed for those we are teaching.

2 Timothy 1:6-7 (Believing in someone)
6 For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. 7 For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.

This passage models how Paul believed in Timothy and in the gifts and talents that he had received from God. We are to be constant encouragers and reminders of God’s gifts in each others lives.

2 Timothy 1:13; 2:2 (Teaching)
13 What you heard from me, keep as the pattern of sound teaching, with faith and love in Christ Jesus.
2 And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.

The main goal of mentoring is to pass on the teaching of Jesus through what we teach to those we mentor. We need to teach in such a way that they are able to teach when we are gone.

2 Timothy 2:2 (Empowering) 
2 And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.

This passage suggests that we are expected to create mentees who can and should teach others.

• Build a relationship with your mentee and pour into their lives.
• Win the right to be heard and trusted.
• Model a genuine lifestyle of love for God and others.
• Make a positive connection every time you and your mentee are together.
• Help them discover their spiritual gifts and God-given design.
• Develop relationships that are strong enough to bear the weight of the truth that you have to give.

• We match up each grade 9 – 12 young person at Calvin with a same-gendered Young Adult or Adult person who becomes that person’s mentor for the duration of their high school years.
• That pairing meets once a month for fellowship and a deepening of the relationship.   That can be as simple as a cup of hot chocolate together and a conversation at the church, going out mini golfing, baking, or playing games.  There is no prescribed format.  The goal is to build the relationship naturally and let it deepen naturally.
• Mentees don’t pick their mentors. We prayerfully match them up and over the years this has proven to be effective.  It has also prevented popularity contests between persons in the Congregation.  We believe that many members of Calvin could be/are gifted persons who desire our youth to grow and flourish and many have stepped up to be mentors.  At the beginning, things can be a bit awkward for some, but we have witnessed that over time relationships form, and deepen.
• In grade 12 we celebrate the graduations of our youth from high school, and we do that with their mentors over dinner and a time of blessing them in prayer.

• If you are asked to be a mentor, our hope is that you will seriously consider this unique and rewarding opportunity.   The future of our youth and their spiritual formation are helped by this ministry, working alongside families and other ministries of the church.
• Please pray for our current mentor/mentee relationships that they will continue to grow and deepen over time, and that this ministry will help our youth find connections now in a faith community that will serve them well as they move out into the world after grade 12 graduation, raising that 25% who stay to a much higher number.